Oh my god! Oh my god!!! Oh my god!!!!! It's finally here!!!! R. Kelly has announced that he has finished 15 new chapters of his horrible/fantastic 'Trapped In The Closet' series....
If you have not seen the masterpiece that is R. Kelly's 'Trapped In The Closet', you have not lived! Click on the picture below, and you can see all 22 chapters on YouTube! Seriously.... It's a magical trip of a movie that runs through R. Kelly's head, with R. Kelly singing all the voices of the characters.... I don't know why you're still reading this! Go watch it!!!!!! You need to get caught up before he releases the next 15 chapters!
Oh, 'Out Of This World'.... How I miss you.... I wanted nothing more as a child than to put my index fingers together and stop time.
The show was about the life of young Evie Garland, played by Maureen Flannigan.... But she was no ordinary girl.... She was born to Donna Garland, played by Donna Pescow (who later starred as Shia LeBeouf's mother in Even Stevens), and Troy Garland.....
On her thirteenth birthday, Evie finds out that her father is an alien living on the planet Anterias. Her father is rarely seen, but he is able to communicate with his Evie through a crystal cube. As an added benefit from being half alien, Evie learns she can pause and un-pause time in the first episode, and later in the series Evie learns she can "gleep" objects into existence, transport herself from one place to another, and withstand up to 2,000 degree heat....
Did you know that Burt Reynolds provided the voice for Evie's father?
Ok.... Now I'm out.... I just watched an episode of the show, the first episode of the show I've seen since I was 12 years old, and it does not translate well in 2010.... I need a palate cleanser.... Time for some 'Trapped In The Closet'!
What is the first thing you think of when you hear the name R. Kelly?
Ok, scratch that, what's the second thing you think of when you hear the name R. Kelly? That's right..... Lyrical genius! His work of art, "Trapped In The Closet", was so hilariously awesome, that it can only be defined as a work of art.... If you've never seen "Trapped In The Closet", R. Kelly's 22-part (so far) hip-hopera, you have not lived..... He seamlessly intertwines a tale of adultery, mystery, and hilarity in a repetitive ballad that could only have come from the mind of R. Kelly. And if that doesn't sell it for you, R. Kelly does all the voices. The whole series is on YouTube, and you can see them all if you click on the picture below....
Back to the reason I'm writing this post..... R. Kelly has struck gold again with his new song "Pregnant" from his new album "Untitled". The song is performed by R. Kelly with Tyrese and Robin Thicke, and it's horribly good.... It's so crazy and catchy, as is R. Kelly's style, that if you're as big of a fan of train wrecks as I am (e.g. Kevin Federline and VH1 Reality Shows) you will enjoy this song as much as I did.... It's so damn catchy that I find myself singing the song in my car, in my office, at the bank, at the grocery store.... It wouldn't be so bad if the lyrics weren't "Girl, you make me want to get you pregnant." So, without further adieu, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you:
